Reflection

Reflection
Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you'll never know me
Every day
It's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where I
Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection
Someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

There's a heart that must be
Free to fly
That burns with a need to know
The reason why

Why must we all conceal
What we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me
I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?"

kampar

kk.. dun think i'll write much.. but guess wat??? im in kampar!!!!! i came yesterday.. ofcoz with a moody face.. :( .. not sure of the place.. wonder wat life's gonna b lyk.. without me familia.. my grannies whom i love soo much.. the friendly comunity of kuala pilah town.. u wudnt believe it.. everyone came out to greet me goodbye.. okay.. not evryone.. but those neighbours ..anties..uncles..patti's ..tata's.. biasalah.. im always nice to them. haha.. poyohnya.. anyways.. yea.. dey all greeted me goodbye.. it reali touched my heart.. and it reali did choke me up abit.. it made me feel lyk im leaving a huge portion of my heart behind.. :(

soo yea.. me .. my amma..my acha.. the 3 of us.. travelled 4 hours all the way to kampar.. once we came kampar.. its wa very easy to locate utar by the ways.. der were just sign boards everywhere..hahaha.. so yea.. after dat i had to go settle my house booking and stuff..so v came to danishhouse office.. settled all the payments for the house den finaly when to my lavish room with the attached bathroom with hot water heater .. a bed ..a study table..and a wardrobe!! im pretty psyched bout it actualy.. so unpacked all my stuff .... phew.. i unpacked all my stuff which looked lyk i was shifting house wei.. but anyways.. checked all the stuff i brought with ganesan the previous nyt.. so he said all the stuff was impoortant.. so thank god.. and when i actually arranged everything.. it was just nice :)

the 1st nyt in kampar my parents stayed at the grand kampar hotel.. i decided to follow them.. not in a way dat i wanna b a kacau daun ..but yea ..just waanna spend the last nyt in the comforts of my parents presence for one last time as i set out to b on my own.. in this foreign land(overeacting now..) in this far a way land.. bla bla bla bla bla.. i was pretty moody by the way.. coz i realli didnt wanna leave my family..the moodiness continued till the next day apparently.. haih..

i dint wanna talk at all.. i was all quite.. my face was clearly upset and my parents were making fun of how funny i looked.. teruk la my parents.. :P but my mom assured me dat evrything will be fine.. dat i'll get use to it all.. and it wudnt b dat bad ..

and she was right! thank god for my friends who are alridi here in kampar.. dey are my seniors now by the way.. hehe.. but they were soo kind enough to show me around.. and guess wat ??? i got a bicycle!!!! we've been cycling around and stuff.. and u wudnt believe it..cycling is lyk the main transport for the students... and we utar students dont hv to look out for cars..but the cars hv to look out for the bicycles.. kikiki..

so yea.. dats all i wud lyk to write for now.. i'll update more soon k.. oh yea.. kampar has great sceneries!!

")

god bless people..

new yer's resolution

HAPPY 2010 GUYS!!!!!

okay i know its little too late for new year wishes.. but still.. happy new years!! haha.. =_= im just bein a little psycotic.. anyways.. new yers was great.. apart from my fon not having credit.. and me not having time to top up.. and when the clock strike 12am on the 1st of jan i cudnt wish anybody!!!!! tho having loads of msges pouring into mine T_T ..its the 1st tym i nvr wished anyone new yers.. *sobs sobs* i posted a shout out in facebook.. hope my peeps will forgive me.. =S

new yers was great anyways.. usualy i'll b in church new year service in FGA KL.. new year services there is A - awesome!!! but im home dis year amidst my cuzins from new zealand ..aunties.. uncles.. childrens.. very homely new year.. and not forgetting the hen's off party(bacholerettes party) we had for my sister felicia!

OKKKAAY.. the hen's off party was just a funny one.. my aunty frm NZ brought alcohol and stuff..so yea.. it was basically all ladies gathered in front of the front porch where v hv a sitting area.. there it was... alcohol.. coca-cola.. sodas.. was quite tempting actuly.. so drank a little bit.. just a little bit.. fuh.. i've drank more... nehh!! just kidding.. anyways.. my sister fel was drinking for the 1st time.. she drank 2 cups alrrdi... and she alridi looked tipsied.. den she joined in for the 3rd.. den she all silent... and guess wat happend..... ?? SHE GOT DRUNK!!! the funny part is the way she showed dat she was drunk is by laughing!!! she was all silent at the bginning den she just started laughing non-stop.. she never uttered a word but she only laughed.. dat was soo weird but funny.. we had to carry her to the bed.. even der she just wudnt stop laughing.. hahahahahHAHAHA!! i kno i shudnt be laughing... but i ..no.. we just cudnt help.. dis is where i guess the sayin "laugh and the world laughs with you" comes in handy..
gosh.. wat a way to start new years.. .. *smirks..*

anyways.. i was suppose to be talking bout my new yers resolution.. but i just started crapping.. so yea.. dis aree my new year resolutions:

1. get my driving license
2. get use to life in kampar
3. study smart and hard
4. pray ferverently, dont doubt God and always trust in his ways
5. pay tithes and offering diligently
6. always be myself and not change regardless of anyone
7. be a confident person
8. be a good servant of God
9. not b afraid to fall in love again
10. get a good christian, loving, kind, caring, compasionate, tall, dark, handsome, independent, able to take care of me in the future boy friend a.k.a the perfect boyfrend!!! uukay.. chill ..chill.. im not particular actuly bout looks and stuff .. honestly ..these are my criterias.. but i just pray for GOD to bless me with the very best he can give.. and as we all kno .. He always gives the best!

wah.. the 10th had a long description eh.. ? and its the one and only resolution which always stays in my new year's resolution list.. clear la.. havent achieved it yet.. haha.. wonder what is taking soo long.. hm...

so yea! HAPPY BELATED NEW YEARS EVERYONE.. ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR FUTURE UNDERTAKINGS.. AND GOD BLESS!!! MUAXX!!

the wedding day

did i mention dat the wedding was a blast???!!!! omg.. u wudnt believe it.. i actuly wore a saree for my sister's wedding and i didnt trip and fall!! okok.. im sure most wud wanna c a picture... but the day was such a rush dat i cudnt even take a good shot of myself..

well the day started as d hair stylist came at 11am to my house.. (well i was still sleepin..) hehe.. oh well.. once i knew she was here i quickly got up tuk my bath and stuff.. she was a pretty cool person.. while talkin v realise v were actuly related!! gosh.. and v were all lyk "malayalee" on each other.. haha.. anyways.. she did an amazing mek up on sister fel(the bride)..

lol.. i kno i need pictures to describe.. but lyk i said .. the day was such a rush dat i cudnt tek any!! here was d situation.. the stylist tot dat she was only gonna do mek up on the bride.. seeing dat the videographer will b here at 2.30 to tek an impromtu video of the bride leaving the brides house to church.. but wat happen? my mum forgot to mention dat she had to do mek up for 3 other gurls which included me, grace(2nd sis) and kisha(cuzin).. the sad part is.. the stylist tuk most of the tym styling the bride.. and she didnt hv tym to style me and my other sis.. :( so tym was of the essence.. everything just bcame late and weding started late.. and it even almost wentt on without my mom!! cn u blieve it?? without my mom??? obviusly i wudnt let dat happen... not me.. not my sisters.. not my dad.. and definately not by the grace of the lord of God!! so we waited until she came for the auspicious ceremony to start.. :)

so den it stared ..the canon in D.. the pageboys started the march.. den the flower girls.. den the maid of honor..den the bridesmaid(me :D) ..the church was beautifully decorated with lavender and white flower.. white laces with purple ribbons.. the flower girls.. maid of honor and i wore shades of purple to complement with the theme of the wedding.. to be honest.. i was soo freakin nervous!!!! i think i walk abit faster den i hw i shud hv walked.. gosh.. i didnt care.. i just wanted to get it over with....

den came my sister felicia presana koren.. the 28 yer old gurl.. whome we thought wudnt get married.. whome she herself thought wudnt get married... who was suppose to been in saudi arabia by now if she had met alvin ashok hunt.. here she comes arm in arm with my dearest acha.. with the white vale covering her gorgeous face(the stylist did a terrific job).. as my dad gave her away to the groom.. dat feeling of just watching the whole ceremony just put tears in my eyes.. yes.. i cried... i dono y i was soo touched.. and i just thought to myself one day i will b dat person who is my sister.. arm in arm with my father bein given away to the one i love and wud spend the rest of my life with.......

*wipes off tears*
anyways.. its my sisters big day not mine at the moments.. *get a grip lydia!!.. ur day will come!!*
haha.. it was a fantastic ceremony.. especialy when it came to the vows where my brother in law said the loudest "I WILL!!" i think in da whole history of "i will's" which echoed throughout the church..!! v cud all c how much he loved and adored my sister ..and i definately think dat this LOUD I WILL will b a nvr ending echo in deir marriege :)

heading toward the end of the wedding.. der was a performance by ivan elexander who is my dear cousin brother who is an amazing singer!! he sang "because you love me" by celine dion.. dat also the highlight of the event.. becoz he had an amazing voice and he sang fantastically.. it was a perfect song for the bride and the groom !!